In honor of the busiest travel day of the year, I’m re-posting my personal thoughts and general rules on travel. I posted this in June, when I had at that point accumulated 24,000 miles and been on 29 flights for 2013. Now, I’m not sure what the current total is.
I’m taking tomorrow and Friday off on the blog. Thanksgiving will include documenting a Christmas wreath tutorial with my mom, so stay tuned!
Enjoy, and happy Thanksgiving!
1. Always carry on. Who has time to wait for their bag? Not to mention at DIA I’m pretty sure they’re on island time. If your flight gets delayed for any reason, you are also free to change plans without any worries of your luggage.
2. Park generally in the same place. Most flights I’m arriving in the 6am arena, to which I don’t even notice I’m at the airport until I’m in the security line. Changing up my parking pattern could be disastrous upon return.
3. When in the security line, do not stand ridiculously close to the person in front of you. This will not help you get through any faster. I have an enormously large personal space bubble, and this drives me insane. If your hot McDonald’s breath is on my neck, you’re too close.
4. Always have your toiletry items in a convenient compartment for the conveyor belt. Don’t add 5min to the people’s time behind you as you scavenge for your less than 4oz items. Also, I hate you Osama Bin Laden for this. Sometimes I just want my normal size moisturizer. I blame you for my travel breakouts.
5. Do not undress for the scanner. I stand behind so many people that I think seriously consider removing their shirt. Easy, killer. You can even keep your giant Michael Kohrs watch on, along with most jewelry.
6. You do not need 7 bins for your carry-on’s. You can put your shoes, iPad, and toiletry bag in one bin. I promise. It’s okay.
7. When you’re through the conveyor belt process, do not loiter in the middle of the walk way. In general, don’t loiter in any fashion, and maybe pay attention to those around you.
8. Don’t get a filet of fish to take on the plane and smell the entire cabin with McDonald’s grease. Some of us have extreme air sickness and said smell only increases the likelihood that I will vomit on you.
9. When walking down the aisle to your seat, be aware of the position of your carry-on. I get body checked by backpacks on a constant basis. Also, if you are over the age of 12 and not a male, a backpack should not be your carry-on of choice. Unless you have a baby, then you get a hall pass.
10. When in flight, if your trip is less than 3 hours in length, the carrier typically does not have fresh food items. This includes sandwiches and the beloved cheese tray. I sat next to a man once that was DEVASTATED he could not get the cheese tray on a 7am flight to Dallas. He then purchased two orders of chips and salsa, ate them at rapid speed, and began to yell “I’M GOING TO BE SICK!” as the ride got turbulent. I laughed out loud, and am still telling this story 9 months later.
11. If the person behind you is stuck in between two very large people, throw them a bone and don’t recline your seat.
12. If you have the middle seat, you have all rights to the arm rests. You’re welcome.
13. I don’t really believe in neck pillows (unless it’s an overseas flight). If you must have one, I don’t think it’s intended use is for walking around the airport, the plane or in society with it around your neck. This is a personal favorite of my sister’s.
14. Don’t be rude to elderly people on your flight or in the airport. I see this one all the time and it breaks my heart. I hate to break it to you rude guy in the security line, but one day, you too will be the elderly man that doesn’t understand the scanner.
15. Always thank your flight attendant. They are there to serve you and put up with difficult behavior.